Have you ever noticed how quickly time flies by. It happens in a blink as the song goes by Revive. Our oldest has turned four over two months ago now and our second has just turned two. Today our third boy has reached his ninth month on this world. You hate to see them grow while at the same time you can't wait for it so they understand when you say "no, the bathroom is not a place to play", or "don't stick your finger in the socket or it will shock you." Time is funny. It is the one thing we can't control, the one thing we don't want to lose, the one thing we spend our whole lives fighting until we are old and saggy and realize what was truly important, the very life we had just lived.
Do you ever get that feeling that you are not where you should be? We have been dreaming of this backpacking ministry for the last four to five years of our lives. Everyday we thought about the possibility but our life and work at the time was where we were focused. Now we are trying to raise 500,000 dollars to move to Scotland, buy a house, and invite young weary travelers into our home and show them the Creator of all things. It is exciting and scary at the same time. Our hearts are in a strange place. I look at the pictures and staff info for YWAM Paisley in Scotland where we will be based for a short time and I feel a strange attraction to them, like I know greater things are in store for my family. And yet I look through old photo albums at our life together in Yei and I see a family that however flawed they may have been was my family. My heart is still there. There is pain, some pain not dealt with, some pain forgiven, released, healed, but through it all the voice of truth shows me how special I am in my Lord's eyes.
Isn't it a strange thing how the only wizard of note was Gandalf. Of the five wizards he was the only one to carry out his God given task of standing against the dark lord, and he was called the Grey Pilgrim. A pilgrim knows that his real home is else where so he is busy with the journey for he knows rest comes at the end. Are we pilgrims? Are we standing against the evil in this world today? Or have we set up house and roots? "We all want love, we all want honor, nobody wants to pay the asking price." FFH, Undone. What is the asking price? Any soldier will tell you, any missionary, any martyr.
Matt and I talk about this kind of thing all the time. I know one good thing that comes from that wandering, homesick feeling is that God keeps us yearning for Him. If we were completely satisfied here, why would we want to be elsewhere? Thank you for sharing your heart. I am so glad I have a brother who is concerned with things not of this world.
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